Christ I haven't posted in this bitch in a long ass time. This fucker is probably dustier than my room after I let it go for 4 months.

I really don't have much to say at the moment. Just wanted to make a comment after such a long time even though nobody reads this ol' thing. Perhaps one day. I need to do a lot of things; get some priorities straight, set some goals, starting doing some things, etc. Things like that.

Instead of constantly sitting around doing nothing, I need to pick up and do something. I don't really know what yet but, perhaps this could be one of those things. Sometimes it helps to read thoughts and opinions. If I speak my mind now and come back and read it later I can see errors or see improvments or something.

Eh, I dunno. Like I said, just kicking the can around, rattling the cage, shooting the shit. We'll see what happens from here.

Yeah, I neglected this thing for a bit. But it's time for follow ups I suppose.

Home slice with the red hair? Bust. Straight. No dice. On top of that, while he seems rather nice, he doesn't talk to me outside of work. He fails at the internet and just about everything else. Mean I know but, I really don't care.

I mentioned needing a new computer. I have one. With XP at that. Compaq Presario V6000. Had it custom built to my demands. It's sooo much faster than my old one. This thing will start up and let me log onto the net in around 1 minute. The other one took about 15... if I was lucky.

I also bought a new guitar which should be arriving shortly. I'll probably post pics and stuff because I never really do that and I figure I could. Maybe I might be able to turn this goofy web journal into something people look at and follow hungrily for updates or something.

I can dream...

EDIT: WTF? I had like 500 spam comments... I swear to god if I ever get those again, I'll hunt down the cunt that posted them and EAT THEIR SPINE. That shit should be illegal and punishable by instantaneous death. No trail, no jury, just a bullet in the face. I mean... I COULD have been more vigilante... but there shouldn't be some cockmunch posting spam shit on my fucking blog, especially on posts from fucking 3 years ago, I mean, what in the fuck? Needless to say, if you share an IP with those nut sucking douches, you won't be seeing my blog ever again.

Yeah, three month delay there, no big deal. ¬_¬

So, what happened to the Taylor kid? Who cares? No one? Okay, well, even though no one cares, he's gone for all I care. He hasn't talked to me at all for 3 months. Never replied to my messages and found himself a girl. So fuck him.

Who do I have on the stove now? Some guy that works at UPS with. John would be his name. Long red hair and *gasp* blue eyes? I may be mistaken though so don't hold me to it. I'm not too sure about him. I've been staring and oogling him for 6 months and he hasn't called me out on it yet. I've been pretty damn obvious too. However, one day not long ago on the shuttle, I saw him looking at me, so I looked and he turned away real quick and obvious like. So I think nothing of it and go back to my buisness, and catch him again. So when we get off the shuttle (since we get off at the same stop) I get off first. I'm a good 30 feet away when *zoom!* he's right next to me. So I walk a bit fast and get to the door and he's right there behind me. Like less than a foot away, so close that he kicks the back of my shoe walking in the door. So I go on and say nothing and he goes on and says nothing. When I drive over to his area from mine to unload boxes, he talks to me. He even goes out of his way to do so. He's hardly ever spoken to me before! The only thing he's ever said was "What did you do that for?" in referance to something kinda' of n00bish that I did, but I didn't work over there so I didnt know. And, he didn't even say it, actually, he just mouthed the words.
This time though, he spoke. He was like "What are you doing here today?" And I was like "I've got some boxes I need to put on a belt" and he was like "Oh, wel we aren't using those *points*, you can use them." and then his supervisor shows up and he walks over to him and tells the supervisor and the sup is like "Yeah, just use those belts" and I'm like "Okay."
So, I don't really know what to think there.
Since then I've been kind of staring at him very blatantly. He still hasn't said a word about it. I followed him onto the bus this morning because well... I kinda' like him so... yeah. Anyway, I sit pretty much next to him and just observe. Doesn't really look at me much or anything. Only thing odd was the Harry Potter book he had from the public library. That would mean that he (being around 18 or so) read Harry Potter, and goes to the library. That doesn't really mean anything though. He doesn't have a car however, and I'm not sure how he gets to work. He always arrives alone, but he leaves with a friend because said friend takes him home. So, I don't know. I'll keep watching though. Obviously. He need to shave too... he'd look a lot better without the fuzz-stache.
All in all, none of it means a damn thing though, because I will continue to gather "evidence" and speak about said evidence in a vain attempt to justify my liking of him and my yearning that he indeed be gay and or like me back at least. In the end, I know he won't and that I, upon getting my hopes up will be left feeling sad again. Tis the way of things it would seem.

Somewhat in that vain, I'm walking all the way out of work every other day. It's about a mile plus change from where I work to the front gaurd shack. Yes, UPS is that big. And, it will be getting bigger in the very near future. Scarey thought. So yeah, I'm trying to lose weight. Starting out slow, trying to get into the habit of doing something everyday, then I'll just add to it. I'm not a fatass, I'm just tired of feeling like it, so I'm doing something about it. Hopefully I see some results... Yeah I doubt that too...

I am also contemplating buying another Computer. I need a new one and would like one with XP... but that leaves me very limited in my choices. As in I only have one choice... Any machine with Vista, I would have to customize to a point where it would cost an outrageous sum of money. I could spring for an Alienware, but I like my arms and legs where they are.

If you didn't get that joke, your a retard and I hope you die.

If you can't tell that I'm feeling rather bitter, cynical, sarcasitc, sad, lonely, and just plain mean right now... the above also applies to you.

Have a nice fucking day.

Indeed, the song of life seems to play a quite steady tune of dischord for me.

First, off, Taylor, if you ever read this, I'm sorry for airing your personal stuff man... I just need a place to vent where I don't feel like somebody will have some stupid BS to say in response. At the moment, that happens to be here. A blog in which not very many people read. At least, none that read it for reading... or something like that. And, if you somehow feel weirded out by what I say about you, then... well... yeah.

So anyway, on with the tour.

I mentioned Taylor in my last post. Said, he was hard to get ahold of and stuff. Well, I learned that was because of his mother. She didn't seem very nice from the few things I heard. So I kinda' wanted to do something to get him away from her... but I couldn't. I didn't feel like I knew him or her enough to really know the situation and do something about it. Well... as fate would have it, he's now away from her. He's also going to be away from me and everyone else for a long long time... if not forever.
According to him, the lovely woman killed someone while driving drunk. Thus, she is in jail and will most likely stay there for a long long long time. Now, his dad lives here in the city... but the oh so thoughtful court system decided that Taylor's dad didn't meet Taylor's standards of living. To me, thats total bullshit. Your going to take the kid away from everyone he knows and cares about just because his dad is a little strapped for cash or whatever the case may be? Now, I don't know if Taylor wants to move with his dad, I really can't say, I didn't push it any further than that. I'm just saying what I feel about what I was told.
So, anyway, he's moving in with his cousins in Ohio. It's not THAT far from here, but it's far enough that I can't visit. I can't invite him over for the weekend, or drive over to hang out with him or any of that. It's too far. A days drive, maybe more, but too far none the less.
He said he'd like to come back for the summer and he could always move back here when he turns 18, but... that'll depend on how things go. Hopefully when he moves and gets settled in and stuff we'll be able to talk more. I'll keep in touch for sure, I don't really want to let this one go.
To me, this kid is perfect. He's everything I want in a person as far as I can tell. I have no reason to believe that he's lying to me or not talking to me for some not so nice reason. I just plain like him. But, at the same time, I don't feel like I can say that for real. We still, by my standards, hardly know each other. We've still never seen each other outside of pictures and we've barely talked on the phone. So I don't know... I like him, I'd go for him if he'd have me. But with all this junk going on, I kinda' doubt anything will come from it. He's an adorable young guy, and I'm an older not so great looking person. (Yes I have self confidence problems about how I look, STFU thanks.) We're going to be seperated by hundreds of miles. He'll probably find some nice guy there and make new friends and that'll be it. After this crap I just don't have any optimism toward things like that. I'm going to talk to him, and do what I can, but I can't really look forward to anything anymore. That's not to say I wont keep looking, but after oh... 13... 14... 15 or so failed attempts... I just don't have a good outlook anymore. 

On top of that, work is picking up. December is peak season, where things suck. Most of the time apparently, it's slow all day. It's just that the days are so fucking long. And on the week of the 19th, the days are going to be even longer. So I shall smuggle in an iPod shuffle or something to keep me busy. Got it all planned out spy style but I wont say it here incase some UPS Nazi security is watching me or something...

Oh well, that's all for now.

Yeah, cheesey I know. But hey, it's true. I have been away for a long time. Over a year it would seem. I just kind of lost interest for awhile. Didn't really feel like talking about stuff. Recently however, I've felt a need to communicate stuffs that go on because well... most of the time I don't really have anyone to talk about it to. Most people really don't give a damn. I just needed to say it. I needed to explain things and talk about stuff that I do without asshole comments from people. I just needed to talk. Not to anyone, but just talk. To express myself. It was then that I remember, hey, I have a blog. I can post shit in it. I can bitch about stuff and I can talk about my car escapades and romantic problems and all that jazz. Maybe people will read it and say junk, maybe they wont. But I don't really care. I need to say shit. So I'll say it here. 

So, what's been going on between now and the last time I posted? Sadly not as much as I would have hoped. I guess I'll start with the basics. In Febuary of lovely (yeah right...) 2007, I got me a job. I now work for the great and wonderful United Parcel Service. That's right, UPS. It but the whole mail system into perspective for me. I get to see how stuff gets from one place to another and how damages occur and all that junk. I work in the Parcel Sea in the north core of the World Port facility. Biggest UPS in the US if I remember correctly. We're like the clean up crew of boxes. If it's busted, has a screwed up label or you were fucking dumb ass and didn't label it right, we get it. 
Before I continue, please, if anyone reads this, for christ's sake, label your box right. It'll have a better chance at getting to your house in one peice if you do. Put one, count them, ONE label on your box. Put it on a flat side, don't put it wrapped around a corner or over the seam or some crap. Don't tape over it, and for the love of all that is holy, don't use the same damn box over and over.
That being said, our job is to fix and relable these poor bad boxes so that they get to their destination on time. It's not as easy as it sounds. You have to run between 3 computer lined up along a massive metal slide that constantly fills with hundreds of boxes ranging in size and weight from tiny to gigantic. I also run irreg's or irregulars. Those are boxes that are just totaly beyond our capabilites. They're too big, too heavy, roll, whatever. We're not supposed to get them. So I get to pull them off the overflow loop (which collects all the crap we don't have room for anywhere else) and drive them back to the irreg section. It's a pretty tough job but I like it. It's more physical and takes up a good amount of time. Makes the day go by faster and works out the muscles. So yeah, that's pretty much it. Boxes and more boxes. Fun. I make money, so I don't care.

Along with this new job, came a new car. I was driving my uncle's car for awhile until I caught this totaly awesome movie. Grindhouse. The totaly rocking double feature of Planet Terror and Death Proof. Well, I love Death Proof. It's either a love it or hate it film and I love it. It doesn't get enough love I think but then, with all the instant gratification and cheap thrills modern society thrives on, I can see why not so many people like it. Anyway, this movie features an awesome primer grey 1970 Chevy Nova. Skull and lightning bolts on the hood along with the duck hood ornament from that old movie Convoy (never seen it personaly). Total bad ass car. I wanted one. So I found one. On ebay no less. It was local enough that we could pick it up. So, I got it. Sniped the auction. One bid win. What exactly did I win? A black 1972 Chevy Nova 2 door. It's automatic with a 350 V8. Sweet looking car. Needs a new paint job and is constantly requiring fixing of some kind, but hey its a bad ass vehicle. Not to mention loud. Flow Master exhaust pipes on this baby. Blows craters into a gravel drive way and if your standing outside the car you can feel each stroke of the engine as a thump throughout your entire body. It's freaking loud. I quite like it. 
I had originaly planned to turn it into the Death Proof car. I actualy had a chance to bid on that car, the Hero car from the movie,  but there was no way it would have gone good. As an intersting note, I had posted about it on a movie prop forum. Somebody there then contacted me and asked about the auction. I linked him and he bought it and we talked about it for a bit. Seemed like a pretty cool dude, I'd like to meet him and check out the car someday. Anyway, I had planned on turning my black machine into the Death Proof car. But, I can't do that. I like the car too much. I want to keep it stock and restore it to near factory condition some day. So, I'm on the lookout for a junker Nova. I have big plans for it too. Not just a shitty replica, but a full blow drag car as well. Grey Primer paint job, skull, duck, full roll cage and some non-replica mods. Gonna' slap a 572 Chevy engine in it. Full gauge set from autometer, two racing seats, a B&M automatic quick shifter, JEG's traction bars, JAZ fuel cell with roll over vavles, optima battery, glass pack exhaust, CD player of coarse, etc. It'll be a total freaking beast when it's done. It'll pull around 650 horepower at the wheels or so. More than enough to beat any Camaro, Corvette or Rice burner that I might encounter in my travels hands down.

Now, onto the romantic ascpet. Well... thats nothing. Not a damn thing going on there. Well, aside from this kid named Taylor. Oh the grief he causes me. He's short, sounds really cute, and he's really sweet and nice. Everything I'm looking for. Only two problems. One, he's hard as hell to get ahold of so I end up playing message tag with him most of the time. Two, he already has a boyfriend. So, aside from hoping mean things or plotting murder, he's out of my reach. So right now I'm just trying to be friends with him. God knows I need more friends to hang out with. Maybe I can turn something out of relativly nothing here. Or at least, that's my hope. If he ever talks to me that is.

So yeah, thats about it. Aside from that, I've developed a taste for emo music. My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy... stuff like that. I like the sound for some reason. Guess my ears got tired off all that hard ass rock I listened to.

Well, enough talking for now. I'll babbled for quite awhile. I shall continue maybe, it's refreshing. Adios till later folks.

Last post...which was...some time ago...in July I beleive...could be wrong...doesnt matter though, anyway, last post, I mentioned making Jack's dragon ring from Dead Man's Chest. Well, I have completed it. It was a long and tedious affair and took lots of work.
Firstly, I needed to find a way to actualy make the ring part...that wasnt so easy. I found a peice of pipe that I took form shop class last year, that worked rather well. So, with some Magic Sculp epoxy putty, I managed to from a band for the ring. Once it set I began to add to it, and beef it up, using polystyrene strip for support. Everntualy, I had made up the bas of the ring. Then, I crafted a "stone" from epoxy and set it into the base. After that was done, the real hard part came. The 3 dragons on the sides and top.
I tried many different methods to creat the little buggers, most of which ended in failure and in some cases, pure disastor. I originaly made one from a rolled out peice of epoxy...it didnt turn out that great. Then, I used my Dremel to carve out a peice of wood...that didnt work either. Next, I drew one on plastic and tried to make a cookie cutter type thing...that didnt work. Next, I tried to carve a was mold. The melted candle wax was too soft, so I remelted it and added some harder stuff which...was bad. When I poured the molten wax into the container it melted the container and hot wax spilled out all over the kitchen. That was fun needless to say. After that, I tried making it out of thick plastic with my dremel. That didnt work either. Finaly, I printed out mirrored pictures of the dragons, laminated them and sculpted them over the picture. I used a razor thin peice of metal I got from an old broken Wacom Tablet to slice it off the paper. I stuck it on the ring, and let it dry. It didnt. The damn thing never dried. So, after a week, I pulled it off and made a new one. This one dryed, and quick too. It was pretty much, perfect. I made the second dragon that same night. Once they were done, I printed and laminated a picture of the 3rd dragon and sculpted it the same way. One it was dried, I carefully pulled them all off and carved some detail into the ring base with my Dremel. Then, I glue the side dragons on and proceded to paint the thing.
I used my skillz to make the "stone" look like jade by laying down a coat of black and drybrushing different green's and metallics onto it, then I coated it with clear acrylic gloss. After that dried, I painted the rest with a mixture of brown, black, green and gold, to give it an aged copper look. Then I drybruhsed a custom mixed copper color onto it to make it look work. I glued the final dragon into place on the top of the ring and coated it all in clear acrylic to protect the paint.
I must say, even I am stunned by the results.
I found a rather large box and stuffed it with packing foam to put the ring in, until I find or make a smaller box that will fit this big ass ring. I went into photoshop and made artwork to decorate the box as well, and I must say, it looks like something I could sell, or something I had bought. It doesnt look like I made it by hand. So, Im impressed with this myself.
I had some concern about the paint chiping off, but its seems to have cured all the way now and is really strong. It made it through a day without chipping so I think it'll be fine.
Im thinking about making another one and making copies of it to sell...but Im not sure. I know people would buy it, but I dont know if I could make it in any other size...aside form gargantuan, so we'll see I suppose.

Aside from that I bought Jack's skull ring off ebay, cause its cool... and it didnt cost like...280 dollars...I got fairly cheap IMO. Im also making a webcomic with a friend of mine, I'll keep whoever the fuck reads this thing up to date on that, or rather...you'll know when we launch it. Rest asured it will involve rock music, guitars, and gay dudes of coarse.

But, anyway, until next time, Adios.

Back for my monthly visit to my dear old web journal thing.
Not really much to talk about unfortunately.

Im single...still. Nothing or no one new there.
Im jobless...but I cant afford to be for much longer, I need cash, and the sooner the better. I've to many things I'd like to do.
About the only things I have been doing is spinning my stories and crafting my crafts.

Ive been working on making Jack's dragon ring from Pirates 2. That not going so well sadly. All I have is a big fat heavy epoxy ring with nothing on it yet. If I could get my hands on some pewter I might be able to make a better one. Or I could just buy one somewhere...but thats beside the point.
Once school starts up I may go back and talk to my old shop teacher. He may be able to help me, not to mention I could use the services and tools of the shop.  I might also be able to find a job there...

Im writing stories as well. Plots for webcomics, full out chapter books, but nothing much is atualy comming to life. Too many ideas to much to write down and not enough patients to do so. What I need to do is work on my art skills which have lapsed over the past year. That way, I can just draw everything and be happy with it.

Thats about it really. Just making crap and being bored. Kinda...boring.

Yes totaly wonderful news. Its so wonderful I cant even beleive it myself.
Actualy Im being sarcastic if you couldnt tell already.

I really need to stop trusting people.
I beleive I mentioned that guy in my last post?
Well...something happened. I dont know what, and at the moment, I dont care. 
All started friday night. Said he was going to the drive in and that he would be back later. Well, he never came back. The next day, he was gone from my freinds list so I messaged him, then had one of my freinds message him just incase. No answer. So I set up another account and messaged him again. Well...that went well. He said he was going to off himself again. So, worried, I called, he hung up. He got mad. He told me to stop calling and to leave him alone. And, that started a bitter word war that would last for the next few days. I talked to his freind and she didnt know, then she stopped talking to me too. I kept bugging him though, I was determined to get an answer. He just got nastier and nastier each time. Finally after promise to leave him alone, he gave me an answer. He said he just didnt like me. I told him that was fine, but I didnt beleive him. He went through too much trouble trying to get me to leave him alone for it to be that simple. But, In keeping to my word, Im leaving him alone. Until I can drive of coarse. Then I will find him and try to get the real reason, because honestly, I dont beleive him for a second. 
Am I mad and angry? No. Im just disapointed and sad that it came to this. That he doesnt have the spine to tell me anything. Poor guy. I really do pity him. However, being the cold bastard I am sometimes, I dont give a flying monkeys ass anymore. He had his chance and he blew it. Like I told him, if he wants to talk, he knows how to find me.

Now, in brighter happier news...Im driving, yay for me. My uncle to me out this morning. I did better than I thought I might so he might actualy let me drive in the near future. Now all I have to do is find a job and work out. 
Since its storming and raining and all that shit like usual for a Kentucky 4th of July, I'm going to cut my wonderful knowledge fest short for the time being. I may post again, in fact I probably will, but, I must go before the power cuts off. So, in the meantime. Happy...whatever the hell your happy about and adios.

Im dusting off the old web journal here for cause I need a place to just say stuff. This is a pretty secluded part of the WWW so I dont mind who by random chance happens to pass by and read.
I'll start off mentioning that, yes its been a little over a month since my last post, and that yes I did say I wasnt going to wait that long, but what can I say, Ive been busy.

Now comes the mucho-ness.
Ive fallen for someone; a really nice sweet guy. He really brings out the best in me. Ive gotten motivated to get up off my ass and work out instead of sitting here all damn day. Im going to start looking for a job, and Im going to start driving. I already has all the paper work, but I dont have the knowledge to operate the type of car I will be getting. So I need to training if you will. I need it soon though, I cant relly on my freinds to drive me Im sorry to say. But, this comes from a very bad experience. I wont say much, I'll just say enough to lay out the plot so to say. Aaron, the guy that I like, its...a fragile kinda of person. He's had it rough. I told him that we would meet up and my freind said she would drive us. Well, my freinds mom wouldnt let her. Being the stuck up idealistic bitch she is, she said she didnt want her daughter to "get in the middle of anything". Now, I take great offense to that. Thats like saying Im not a decent enough person to not fuck in the backseat while shes driving. Now that pissed me off. Well...Aaron took it to mean the worst. That I didnt want to see him. I guess he had had so much that was too good to be true, that he figured I was just another one of those, and that he was just going to end up hurt again. And, Aaron, if you read this baby, Im sorry, Im just saying what I gathered from your messages.
Anyways, I ended up spending the next 4 hours late at night until early in the morning trying to convince him not to kill himself, and that I really did care about him. Thank god, I got through to him in time. My freind Vanessa helped me out through the whole thing, so props to her. Right now, he's doing okay as far as I know, and Im working on trying to see him really soon. 

On a lighter note, I finally finished my lightsaber from shop class. All the wiring is done, all the paint and clear coat is on, and it looks mighty fine. We've even got it entered in the state fair. Its totaly 100% scratch built. Made from solid steel. Its my current masterpeice thats for sure.
I also bought three more force FX sabers. I got the massive 7 foot double bladed Darth Maul saber and I got Anakin's blue lightsaber from episode 2, and Luke's from The Empire Strikes Back. The maul saber is awsome, but the 2 gems of my collection are the Anakin and the Luke. Both of them have been out of production for quite some time. The Anakin is the very first FX saber ever made back in 2002. Its still in great shape. The older sabers used EL strip instead of LED's so theyre not as bright, and the sounds isnt very loud either. The Luke was newer, so it used LED's. It was much brighter and louder, but still not on par with the new ones. The handle is beautiful though. It has to be on of the most acurate and well blanced of the set so far.

Well, I feel a little bit better having said all that, so I'll be heading back into the unknown for a bit. I'll return soon for another post.
Adios.
 

Happy High School Graduation to me! Yay!

It was yesterday, the 25th. It went by much faster than I expected.
I have to say, Im gonna miss school. All my freinds that I dont have a way to get in contact with, all my cool teachers, the little emo kids, the hot girls and guys, the conversations, shop, all...well...most of it. Im glad its over though.

Im taking a big break from work in general for awhile. Ive been really stressed out here lately, so Im taking a vacation. While on that vacation, Ill be searching for a job, and wether I can take the classes I want to take in some form of college, be it online or for real. Either way, I refuse to take and pay for classes that I deem unecessary. Im also going to try my luck with dating again XD
Ive got two people to follow up, if I cant get either of them, then I guess...well...I'll just wait and see.

Ive got a new Force FX lightsaber on the way now. Darth Maul's double bladed one. Its on its way as Im typing this. I should be here monday, accept that monday is a holiday so no postal service. So, Im betting on tuesday.
Ive also got to shit rig my sattelite for a few day. My remote just flat out died so now...I have no way of using it at all. After 3 am...it off for good until they send us a new one. And, since we havent talked to them yet...I wont be watching TV in my room for a few days. So, as a quick fix, Im going to get a peice of 25 foot coaxial cable and run it from my other TV to the one in my bedroom. It means that I'll have to go into the other room to change the damn channel, but at least its something.
Having an imagination pays off occasionally.

So, I'll be back posting for awhile I think.
Anyways Im outta'  here for now.